happy day...

O Happy day... O happy daay....
O happy day...

today was great!
since last night i have this energy and excitement about today and it happened
so wonderful..
i joined a bible study program for 5 weeks
and the opening week was marvelous
i get to learn so many things.. and it revealed a lot about my faith and the way it should be
there's a dance at church today and it was fun..
well everything went well today...

and it has been a loong time since i wrote about bun..
ah, i missed her everyday.. hoping for a day when we can be together again..
but God has told me to use my time not to wait..
but to live happy, to search His will and be the person He wants me to be
so i want to end this day with a great feeling as well..

Lord,
Because love is patient...
Help me to be slow to judge, but quick to listen.
Hesitant to critize, but eager to encourage,
Remembering your endless patience with me.

Because love is kind...
Help my words to be gentle and my actions to be thoughtful.
Remind me to smile and to say “please” and “thank you”
Because those little things still mean so much

Because love does not envy or boast, and it is not proud...
Help me have a heart that is humble and sees the good in others.
May i celebrate and appreciate all that i have ad all that i am, as well as doing the same for those around me...

Because love is not rude or self seeking...
Help me to speak words that are easy on the ear and on the heart.
When i’m tempted to get wrapped up in my own little world, remind me there’s a great big world out there full of needs and hurts

Because love is not easily angered and keeps no records of wrongs...
Help me to forgive others as you have forgiven me
When I want to hold onto a grudge, gently help me release it so i can reach out with a hand of love instead

Because love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth...
Help me stand up for what is right and good. May i defend the defenseless, and help the helpless.
Show me how I can make the difference

Because love always protects and always trusts...
Help me to be a refuge for those around me.
When the world outside is harsh and cold, may my heart be a place of acceptance and warmth

Finally, because love always preserves...
Help my heart continually beat the love for You and others
Thank you for this day when we celebrate love, and for showing us what that word really means.

Amen..

Holley Gerth

perception..

Perception & perspective...
each one word, so many ideas and thoughts...
a word which can unite..
a word which can destroy..
how hard is it to control them?
for as long as you live, you'll always have perception & perspective
a very hard way to unite these two things..
everybody can be right... they just have different perception and perspective.
but because of that.. a war can start...
a relation can be broke...
such a meaningful word to live with..

week 3

i had to postponed my fasting since the sinshe gave me some medicine i had to drink...
the 2 days of fasting are marvelous...
and somehow, till the end of this week i kept thinking i'm fasting.. or at least i pray about things to ask and to do...
this week my brain worked again.. lots of jobs done and new ideas poped-up..
next weeks gonna be another heavy training ...
need to secure my body sice there are sooo many sick people around
the damn thing is that i didn't swim this week...
no exercise... sigh... next week have to be better...

2nd week

2nd week of fasting....
never thought i could fast at camp...
amazingly, i could =D
its getting better last week
still hard to control my self though....
but i hope each week there are more progress

i pray the lord keep my soul to thee..
so what i see, i can see from His eyes..
what i said are words from His mouth..
what i think is from His mind..
what i feel comes from His heart..
and what i do, comes from my faith to Him....

Fasting....

a week i've been fasting....
a hard week to obtain my health... sigh..
well, at least i've managed it though..
gladly..

we'll see next week...

here i am

light of the world
you stepped down into darkness
open my eyes let me see
beauty that made this heart adores you
hope for a life spent with you

here i am to worship
here i am to bow down
here i am to say that you're my God
all together lovely...
all together worthy...
all together wonderful to me

king of all days
oh so highly exalted
glorious in heaven above
humbly you came to the world you created
all for love's sake became poor

i'll never know ho much it cost
to see my sins upon that cross

call upon the name of the lord
and be saved...

here i am to worship...

buitenzorg

A memorious weekend @ buitenzorg.. whatever that means
I had a wedding invitation, its an old friend
It had great video & pre wed pictures
I miss bun a lot,.. hoping she was there with me

the only desire rob n i have is to meet tungs..
haven't heard any news from her since a while
and yea.. we met her.. and afterwards we go to talk..
like usual times.. old times..
always bring joy when we had this moment
a moment to treasure, while we can..

the next day i met titondut & marie..
they told me bout their honeymoon
he's damn fatso =P
but its nice to see them happy, such a newly weds couple..
my best friend.. hope the happiness never ends eh man?

eniwei, above all, bun's sharing was the most loveliest thing that happened that day
at night, i met togi. haven't met him since 12 years ago.. and yesterday might be the last time i ever see him, since he's going back to germany this weekend..
ah, how time flies by... you never know..
but its great that we have this friendship.. a loong lasting one i believe
i close the day with give thanks as He close the day with the brightness of the moon and smiling stars..

buitenzorg, 22 januari 2006
a city i once wish to forget..

X mas is here?

x mas has passed...
but where is it? i didn't realize that at all
i didn't realize its coming..

flying back home, again

tomorrow i'll be flying back home..

but this time i feel like i wasn't ready to go..

still lots of thing to do or my prep for coming home is not ready...

weird..i'm coming to my freedom but i don't feel happy

excited yeaa.. but not happy....

but i really want to go home...

its just weird..

so well, i'll be flying back home, again....

Who?

I was walking on water.... or feel like water, i guess
I see the distance, its a horizon filled with birds flying, clouds whispering
i smile seing the glorious wonder and i looked down..
there's an image of me
i keep smiling till i see that the image is not smiling...
i wonder why....
i looked closer, i even step and move my feet around on the water to make sure i am seeing the same image
it still didn't smile...
i take my time to think while the sun lower herself down to sleep
i see the image back and forth, no changes...
till it finally dissapear when the world turn over
"its not me!!" i shouted..
but why is it looked like me?

another time of the year

this is the end of 2005...
the last month.
i dunno where to put my heart...or where my heart is
its somewhere blur or on a crossover
hard to try to picture a beautiful end.
Hope floats everywhere for open hearted & opened eyes
but sometimes we just don't want to open it
coz when its closed you'll see nothing, feel nothing
maybe just a sense of quietness and peace
is it?

blebeQ..blebeQ

i'm drowning.....
i don't know where and why...BlebeQ blebeQ
i'm just drowning...
blebeQ...

ends...

finally it ends.. i'm off the training season..yipiee!! =D
relief it brings, yes...
now i can do more things... reading, watch movies, playing, have fun.. & definitely take a rest for a while.... and other things as well
but at the same day, it also ends a life of a friends father...
deepest condolence for you adit..

wel, every start has an ending...
and every ending always marks another new start...

2 more... 2 more!

just 2 more training n it's over!
yup.. i'll be sittin behind my table again, working on new progams for next year. usually i don't really like working behind tables and i prefer camps and training.. but, well.. when you're full loaded with these things.. you just hope it ends...
& well, after all this non stop camp & training season, finally it will end.. at least i'm not in charge anymore when there's another training this year... =P
i can rest my body and began to sharpen my mind again..
which i need badly.. hehehe
so this weekend says it all... n after that...
I'm FREE baby!!!

online..

i woke up this morning n found out that my computer has been online for 2 hours...

nobody was here, just me...strange...

did i dream, turn my computer on n didn't realized any of it?

i don't know..

black coffee..

i got this from a friend.. a coffeemania i guess =P

you drink coffee not because it's sweet
but more because it's bitter..
coz then you hope it'll make you feel better

bitter and better... two words that separated by a vocal
but had far different meaning
but when u feel bitter and you get better
thats when life counts..
wel, eventually everything will get better don't it?

november rain

hah! gak nyangka dah lama gak ngisi ni blog.. kangen juga hehehe
banyak sih things that happen with me during this time..
frustration, tired, lonely, weak, kebanyakan sih itu..hehe
haven't been my best days

but i know its a test... its a training for me to be better.. to be stronger..
to have more faith and keep being happy..
to explore my leadership, upload my wisdom & patience...
ah, just to be better deh pokoknya...

lots of sad stories around me this month..
and it happen to people and friends that i care...
must've been hard these days... dunno why it all happened at the same time..
well, i guess it hadn't been the best days for them as well..
break ups and break down.. none of them r good to see or hear

as the word said..
its just another november rain..
hangin' there everybody, the sun will go up again for us!!

Magic

Magic still happen.. or is it miracle?
hard to tell the difference in this matter..
but something happened at camp that is hard to tell...
one thing to say is.. God is so amazing!

when do you ever held something in a rainy season and everytime you're doing the activity, the rain stopped, while in other places it rained heavily? this is just not one time, but continuously when we are outside camp doing outdoor activity, from morning till night... and when we're not on the show, thats when the rain dropped ... one word.. amazing!

that's one of the small miracle.. but that's not what i'm talking about
this camp changes lives... in a flick
its amazing how i can see all these..

2 more push your personal limit camp this week
its time now, to push our limit!
and we'll see the magic, and the beauty of God....

PUSH YOUR PERSONAL LIMIT

It's coming again...
the Push Your Personal Limit Camp season
its always... always fun.. hahahaha...
tiring definitely and the theme works for us as well
we have to push our butt on makin this camp worked out
dealing with the nature is harder than anything
stil.. we can enjoy all of them nicely =D
and see how God is soo good.. and incredible!
He is an awesome God indeed..

this time the flow run smoother than the last one..
each of us understood the purpose and it helped a lot in working together
3 waves are still on the way, it's a good beginning and a good start
so, gotta push my own limit then...
back to camping site sunday...