behold..

STONeS

The wOrld will proVide you with sToneS everyday...
What you build out of it, itS your Choice.

Wall, Road or a Bridge...
you may even choose to build noThing

at the end,
the world will know you by what you did with it..

Freeky Freely Thinking

UPH lagee...
been a year since i that moment...
a great moment it was.. i still remembered everyone of them. Now we met in a tottaly different situation and in a different position as well. Many didn't know, i came not as a consultant or a profesional... but as a friend, and it put me in a better place to do what i can, to say what i should and to think freeky freely...
it took me in a whole lot better view to see everything actually... -the comittee and the participants as well- and to give inputs on everything.. but well, it turns out that it wasn't that easy

the event was great,.. the commitment from the comittee are astounding, they did everything they could.. they even barely sleep! the communications are a bit nasty though and the atmosphere was not so good, but they did it! and that's what count, wel, besides all the lesson they could learn

the participants.. well i guess they've stayed to loong in their comfort zone.. it made them a bit afraid to take risks and get out from it.. its so obvious though, with the environment they lived in and all other things surrounds them, What can i say? but fandy had it in one word.. "think deeper" ... cool words from the new senat chief!

I see the future of our generation sinking bit by bit...
if we don't rescue it, our genaration will fall down...
new perspective i learned, and definitely a new chance given by the almighty to take part in this world.. sounds like an old theme eh?
but hope is there, floating.. just had to work damn hard for it

in this place, for myself.. i learned about believing, surrendering, trust and being a leader itself.. and once again, i met our dear lord.. just in a glance, but enough to realize that He's always there....

on Counting...

april will be the moment..

tick..tock...tick... tock...

Future

'we don't care where you have been, we care where you are going'
No matter what happened in d past doesn't matter anymore.
What you plan & hope does matter..
dat's why, You r never alone

Turbulence

There are such turbulence in my brain circuit.. this thing i've had in my life for years. Such disturbance from time to time.. Over & over again, i've been troubled with these which can be soothing or annoying. Most of d times its annoying though.. No reasons, no answers. No explanation to this at all.. When will it stop? when will it end?
Only heaven knows..

reflect..

one of the sign about growth and maturity is the ability to reflect ones life to see the unseen
and to see beyond what is seen...

BAN...JRIIIT

jakarta banjrit seminggu belakangan ini..
lucu juga sih... separo separo
gue jadi bisa liat orang orang tuh seperti apa
yang kaya sampe yang miskin, kadang gak ada bedanya
semuanya bukan ditentuin soal duit...
jah... kelakuan sama aja, gak ada beda
pemerintah ma rakyat tuding tudingan..
emang cirinya bangsa kita ya gini ini

menarik liat semuanya on location
ikut bantu jadi relawan di posko kaput
naek truk, drop makanan n evakuasi yg mo ngungsi ke gading
sampe tengah malem, 2 hari berturut turut...
sambil doa banjirnya surut n kering
sementara langit item n mendung terus...
tapi pas lagi evakuasi sih puaanaas mpe kebakar kulit

seru, cape n yang pasti bisa bersyukur juga dapet pengalaman seperti ini
bisa liat orang orang juga.. ketemu anak anak di jalan
ketemu anak anak K5 yang ikut bantuin.. bangga ma mereka yang pasti
gak cuma ngabur n ngungsi atau ngeluh, tapi langsung turun bantuin
thats what i call leaders!

eastSIDEstory

the air smell so sweet...
there's a coffee shop, sometimes i like to buy a cup
there's a bus waiting every time to get aboard
wel, wouldn't it be a story?

its just another east side story
where everyone had a tail to tell
like hundreds people before me
there's something you hold on to, and something you let go
people say someone who really can't have is the one you really want most
think about it sometimes, whether its real or not
but whatever it is...
life goes on the same...
its just like an east side story

live and let die

when you live,.. i guess you don't die
but for some people, living is dying
when you saw dead people.. would you say its a life?
we'll never know how life and death separates us
just be thankful that we're alive...
live and let die

One Moment in Time

each day i live, i wanna be a day to give the best of me
i'm only one but not alone
my finest day is yet unknown...

i broke my heart for every gain
to taste the sweet, i face the pain
i rise and fall
this much remains

i want one moment in time
when i'm more than i thought i could be
when all of my dreams are far beat away
the answers are all up to me
give me one moment in time
when i'm racing with destiny
then in that one moment in time
i will feel eternity.. i will be free!

i lived to be the very best
i want it all, no time for less
i've laid a plan now lay the chance
here in my hands.......

i want one moment in time...

Anirah's Cross

Anirah is my grandma
she was a prefect grandma to all of us...
a kind and loving person, not to mention how humble she was...
i never saw her get mad or yelled at people....
even when grand pa yelled or scolded her....
not even ONCE!

She's already been gone for 5 years
but her memory lived inside all her sons and daugther, grand sons and grand daughter.. a remarkable grannie which you can't find anywhere in this world.
before she passed away, she requested her last wish,
and its to give all her grand sons and grand daughter a golden cross carved with her name and grandpa's name on it...

and a week ago at the tirta's family gathering... everyone of us received that golden cross..
just a simple and tiny cross but makes me how wonderful she was..
and we all give thanks to her...

i love you grandma, we all love you
even after you're gone.. or eventhough we didn't visit you much
but you know how much we all loved you..
you're the best grandma we eved had...
and your name will always be carved in our hearts

BIG Tirta's family gatHerinG!

29 - 31 DECEMBER 2006
Serenity Villa, Lembank

its the BIGvenue for tirta's family
after a lot of hope during the past years, we finnaly gathered again at villa serenity, lembank
everyone gather round except b-benk, oci, ecu and the usual one.. the one and only ngkim nela..
sasa and kenneth was brought on the first day, just not enough to blend in but at least they showed up...

being one as a family is something you just don't find everyday lately..
it makes us remember all the good ol' days when we can still shared the POC excitment, one of the most remarkable venue in tirta's family tree

Time flies by and things changed .. from year to year, decade to decade
new familes created, new babies born and new members coming
but the family never changed.. tons of laughter gloomed in every corner of the place
everytime we gather, there's big sounds of happiness, yet sentimental and emotional
people counting more family members to come
its just wonderful to be in such condition

now we have the updated and most complete database, lots of new planning for the future ahead such calendar, t shirt, next gathering schedule, training programs and lots of excitement, spirit and dreams to come

follow ups coming up.. hope floats for a better big family

ShaZaM!!

ShaZaam!!!
i'm back on where i should've been...
after more than a month, finally i'm back on writings...

some new things had happened along the way.. the best moments and the bad as as well..
let this also be my news letter

in october tons of burdens, fun, anger, hope enthusiasm spin on and off, mix at the push your personal limit camp! it's always been like this every year
one of the most incredible moments i've ever run into...
my favourite camp from years to years

new excitement, new challenges, new atmosphere and definitely an improvement program. we have new programs, new printed workbook (yippiee!!), new teams and many more..
unfortunately not all the facilitators understood every meaning of it since they're new, but its good for them cause they also learn a lot from the program...

always in and out.. a balance i should say?
naa.. better next year, which i believe i'm gonna miss... a lot
i get to see the originality of the kids, the team and the development that had take place..
awesome!

new atmosphere @ school, the way they changed, some good and some others didn't. but that's how things went when you give all of it to all kids without any chance to select them.
after 4 waves of PYPL, my body began to exhaust.. but not the enthusiasm.. and thats what generates the energy level in my body, waive and massive,.....coz live in awaits!
the most exciting moment for me... a loong waited program since the kids are the ones i knew for more than 2 years. I've waited this chance a loong time, as some kids asked me whether i'm joining in or not.. its been up and down since theres no certainty whether i'm allowed to go or not.. few days before D day, i've finally granted the permission to go! i can't believe in goin live in again after years... since high school man! 14 years ago!! whoo haa!!

LIve IN
i know NOTHING before i go! nothing at all, and as know myself, it annoys me.. so i began searching here and there for information, not the best there is but at least i had a picture about it, alhough it was not a blue print of the event
i was placed at cuntel village, and as the guys said ngaduman was always better than cuntel, i told myself, "than lets have fun and make it good no matter what happens", and frankly .. thats what happened for almost everyone at cuntel village.
the village is located up to the south hill of salatiga city, around one hour from the city. about 134 families lived there, most of them earn their living by farming. it was cold up specially after the sun sets down around 6 o'clock
the situation when we were there are so pity, no rain in 7 month, and they can't farm.. barely no plants survived.. but they survived in hope.. cool aren' t they?
2 waves from physics and social class, both of them rocks in their own way..
lots of dynamic rythm.. mm.. the food was awesome! can't forget about it..

back @ home, a week after Live In i had an accident. and i broke my leg!
a first time experience ever, and somewhat it didn't terified me much, ah i guess my kinda mistake not taking it seriously... i can't move my feet much and i can't go anywhere for a month.
feeling lazy most of the time as i had not many things to do afterall..
and one day i discovered that i don't have anything to do.. and it scares me!! =D
nothing much happened besides my healing process..

uhm.. i broke up with inge after months of uncertainty. don't feel much about it and again made my friends wonder of the feeling i had.. this guy just broke up but he loooks fine... and i'm fine indeed...
so, a singular beacon has been led again...
everything until desember, SHAZAM!!

A SURE WAY TO A HAPPY DAY

Happiness is something we create in our mind
It’s not something you search for and so seldom find
It’s just waking up and beginning the day
By counting our blessings and kneeling to pray

It’s giving up thoughts that breed discontent and
accepting what comes as a gift heaven sent
It’s giving up wishing for things we have not
and making the best of whatever we’ve got
It’s knowing that life is determined for us,
And pursuing our tasks without fret, fume or fuss

For it’s by completing what GOD gives us to do
That we find real contentment and happiness too

FREEZING TARUTUNG! - day four

Day 4
Wake up, bread & breakfast, siap2 melalui jln yg panjang ke tarutung.. (tararutung - pada gosong, klo kt org sunda hehehe)..4 hours trip. Stopped by di Siborrong Borrong (knp ya di tanah bataq ini bnyk si-nya?) mkn a different style of piggy.. Piggy all d way niih!! Fatso me.
Jalan ke salib kasih, the cross of love. Daerah wisata rohani di tarutung.. It is a hill of forests, & on top of it (wel, almost top sih) there's a big cross. A VERY big one! Huge & enormous! tp kudu jln kaki naek ke atas bukit dulu, lumayan tinggi & jauh.. Ada rumah2 doa & ada tmp ibadah outdoor gt.. Bagus juga.. Tp sekali lg pemandangan Tarutung itu bener2 TOB! Sebuah kota dikelilingi bukit2,. Kyk di lembah gt... Cold & freezing, yet marvelous! Ketemuan ma John & Tiar temennya yosi, seneng bgt mrk, kawan karib dr kampus.. Trus ke rumahnya john yg sgt sederhana.. A small wooden house in the hill.. Just like in country movies, but NOT a cowboy movie :p. Sometimes I wonder how would it be if I live there..
I ride john's bike to his house from the love cross.. Freezing!!..it was really freezing!! I'm a short-pants rider in the wild freezing air

Kita cabut ke siantar jam 5 sore, 5-6 hours trip.. Beli ombus2 di jln pulang, smsan ma tmn br yg mo ujian (wiiihiiw asiknya biqn sirq org hehehe :D) & janjian doa brg anaq2 Life Group. Nyampe di siantar, jlnnya gedee, kyk jln sudirman di bandung.. Cuacanya jg ok, dingin sepoi2 gitu, small city, n guess what.. Bersiih boow!! Cm balikpapan yg bs nandingin bersihnya siantar. Lgsglaah kita CARI DUREEN! Hehehe.. to b fair, agaq2 mengecewakan sih durennya,sedikit, secuil mungil ukurannya but who cares! This is duren man!!
Sikatlah yg bs diembat hehehe :p (da kyk org Batax gw ya hehehe) & bersyukurlah kami padaNya, asli batak kali aku inilah! Bah :D

Nyampe wisma yg kasurnya kyk papan (untung da biasa hehehe) lngsung bless..
& rebutan colokan dulu sebelumnya whihi..

32 YEARS OF MARRIAGE - day three

22.15 PM
this is d day dat we want to celebrate.. We hugged each other & we prayed together. Da gt keluar nikmatin the morning view.. Wuuaa.. Kereen bgt Boow! Indah d... Klo stay disini bbrp hr buat istirahat jg okay.. pemandangannya bagus bgt, palagi klo da matahari..coz selama disini blon ketemu matahari.... Hehe langsunglaah foto2, capturing the moment & scenery..the lake is Very beautiful, the hills are georgeous, standing tall & firm, yet lovely.. Everywhere you look, there are hills & water..

makam raja sidabutar di tomok jadi inceran berikut. tmptnya c bener2 ga ada yg bisa diliyat. Daerah ini gak bisa jual apa2... Cuma numpang alam aja, what a waste!
da diceritain latar blkngnya, kita liyat rumah tradisionalnya batak ampe ke dlm2 rumahnya.. Ini doang yg worth disitu. Eeh, da gitu ujan turun dgn hepinya, mungkin da tau kita gaq ada yg bawa payung hehehe ya ujan ujananlaaa kita ngejar jam brkt feri. Untung deket bgt dr situ.

So,@ ferry i began to sigh.. Thinking that i would miss a lot of beauty.. I saw the clouds & the rain covering everything in front of my eyes..

Awan nutupin pemandangan yg indah, mataharipun enggan menampakkan wajahnya, the clouds covering a beautiful landscape seakan akan bilang sama matahari "kali ini gw giliran gw yg show off". Well, klo mo jujur sih, dikasi awan mendung gt juga ttp bagus koq..awan awan yg nutupin sebagian gunung & pemandangan parapat yg diselimuti awan juga bagus bgt, kecuali buat camera. jd emg giliran awan yg show off.. Tp Di kejauhan matahari udah ngintip..

Beautiful will always be beautiful, no matter what may come.. The show off is over, dan walopun matahari gaq nongol (dan seharian itu gaq nongol seharian), I can see all d view. It's still magnificent! I climb up the ferry's ladder to see the view.. Never want to go down.. I can see all around in d middle of d boat without blinking.. God is soo awsome! All this beauty He created didn't miss a spot!

We docked @ parapat n we’ll, not much to tell.. Not much to see.. cuma batu gantung yg trnyta cuma gt aja.. Tetep pemandangannya yg tiada tara.. Liat monyet monyet cilik berkeliaran di pinggir jalan.. Eh beneran monyet loo.. :D. Till night there's nothing special to tell, except that we share old memories.. Remembering & reflecting the first 8 wonder years as a familly... We talked & laugh.. Till we all fall asleep

THE TELE! - day two

11.25 pm, 22 sept 06
Second day...
We depart from the hostel @ 10.. Round around ke pasar bunga & buah.. Semuanya bgs2.. Bunganya jg indah2.. Kyk di puncak bgt deey.. Buahnya jg murah2.. Borong jeruk, terong belanda, & mangga mungil tp manis.. Muter bentar bwat mkn pecel! Trus ke tmn hutan rakyat bukit barisan, ktmu bnyk monyet, yg lucu, salah satu msk ke mobil sebelah & ngembat permen permen,.. Yg laen pd ikut turun dr po'on.. Rameing d ma monyet.. Didn't touch them..
Take some pic, then off we go..

Jlnnya gaq lebar tp jauuh & luruus lurus.. We stopped by to a very interesting place called taman wisata iman. Disitu ada replika & patung2 religius dr 5 agama, & since this is a christian area, you could find church everywhere.. Gkpi, hkbp mostly..di area seluas 13 ha itu ada patung2 peristiwa dr jmn abraham ke musa, trus jln salib yesus sampe disalib & bangkit.. Yg laen kecil2 :p...

From Karo to Toba
We stopped by again @ tb simatupang & l manik statue.. A good view around the forest. Take some pictures & realized that i'm fatsoo now. Need to shape up my body again hahaha...

The last stop was magnificent! its called tele hills & mountains.. You could see lake toba from a distance & pemandangan bukitnya man!! Ga nahaan!! Sayang bgt batere camnya da tepar.. Jlnnya beneran nyusur pegunungan, & jlnnya kecil bgt, blm pula bnyk batu yg jatoh dr atas pd mejeng di tengah jalan.. Wuu... Never saw such scenery in front of my eyes, biasanya cm liyad di tv.. This is not a trip, this is an ADVENTURE!! aweesoomee!

A magic wonder that God had created.
Sayang blon dibuat maksimal promosinya..pdhl amat sangat menjanjikan. The people are too traditional.. Not educated enough to see how they can promote this place. Indonesia tu kaya raya, tp most of the ctizen tu org2 miskin.. Well, sebenernya kita gaq pernah merdeka dr penjajahan.. Sigh..
what a waste of beat. Penduduknya masi tradisional bgt.. The traditional is good, but the way of thinkingnyaa itu looow.. antara sayang, sebel & kesel... sigh.. merananya negeriku

So we arrived @ samosir yg sepiii bgt jam 5.30 pm.. Di jln cm liyat rumah2 traditional & kuburan yg jauu lbi mewah dr rumah itu sendiri..

Cr hotel carolina which is good & very cheap, good view too, cm da mlm..
Satu persatu tidur.. I stay awake the last..

Wondeful scenery.. Amazing view, lots to think, a great give thanks in the end..

MEDAN'S JOURNEY - day one

21 sept 06, 13.42 WIB
gw menjejakkan kaki pertama kalinya di bandar udara polonia, medan.

kebiasaan dan pikiran bawah sadar sering membuat kita melakukan sesuatu berdasarkan pola yg udah tersimpan di otak.. Sama seperti tadi waktu gw nyampe di cengkareng.. Lngsg cek in, & setelah 5 mnt ngantri, I realized something was wrong.. I was lining on d way to batam!! Mmm.. How mind can take us that far. Selama ini klo ngantri, mikir bkl ketemu bokap nyokap tujuannya selalu ke batam sampe gw nyadar, koq flight numbernya beda yah sama flight number gw.. Sampe akhirnya gw liyad,.. God, tujuannya ke batam! Quickly I ask for the right line, & everything went well.. N well, airasia ngaret spt biasa..
POKOKNYAA GW DAH NYAMPE MEDAN! hehehe

Skrg gw lg nunggu bonyok & ko2 gw di bndara krn flight mrk jg di delay yg malah ga jls jam brp brktnya... I'm Waiting with no confirmation, sambil liatin org di sekitar yg berinteraksi penuh dinamika.

There they are.. Estimated time is 3.00 PM
Thank god there's technology called PDA so i can write & browse. But i'm starving to death, soo hungry :D
We rent a car with the driver, a relative from a relative.. So, our trip will be accompanied by a green krista.

Brastagi!
It is our first destination, directly from medan.. We stopped by only to buy bika ambon. There's this road filled with bika ambon store, all d way..

On route, we stopped by several times. First, is to buy Grilled PORK! lapo medan coy! It's delicious & cheap! Yosi took some pictures of the maids there which r very happy with it! Buungkuuuss!!

Second stop is to buy star fruit & jambu.. Again, it was very cheap & we had a chat with a small kids who sell the fruits..

Third, Durian time!! We only bought 3 durians & it was enough, coz certainly it was not gonna be the last time we eat durian here.. Hehehe..

Fourth, i'm really tired, mom bought some toasted corn. Can't hardly eat anymore... didn't finish it as well.

@ 7 we arrived @ brastagi, ato berastagi... Tmpnya kyk puncak abees bow, ato cipanas laa..dingiin, berkabut, Oke juga c.. Kita puter2 btr nyari tmp nginep.. Dpt yg murah meriah & bersih..
Trus trnyata qta yg ngakunya da kenyang
ttp aja ngeganyang tu piggy panggang ... Nasinya jg seabrek abrek!!

First day was impressive. Bnyk hal br yg bisa diliyad & dinikmati.. Thank God for it..we close the day with give thanks to d lord..

end of the day

i'm just sad this nite...
a good day at the start...somehow plans changed..
i should've felt better than this.. but i don't
i know it'll go away as fast as i can think of..
but anyhow i can only say thanks to the lord above..

so, thanks...