more...

more hectic....

and you just dunno how problems come to you... 

thank you

forever its just a thank you....

whenever you run...

wherever you go...

whatever you do...

thank you..

thank you..

thank you

hectic

Hectic!

I'm damn hectic!

feels like walking in a circle..

nowhere to go, nowhere to move...

God I miss you so... 

paint

every touch of a brush marks a difference 

every color creates different meaning

and every stroke gives a different depth

swipe your brush here and there... 

use any colors you want

you are the painter..

it is a painter who paint the picture

not the picture painting the painter..

so paint, painter...

Where it will lead life to

What would you do when you need to define your life?
How would you answer the question to the reasons of your current life?
What if you think you have the answer all along, but yet you're never sure about that answer?
That's why I needed to see you.
Although I don't really know what to ask or say, I just know I needed to see you to understand what or who shaped my heart


Now I understand that you still live inside it, and very much alive
How I wonder when will it last.. only to know that it may never disappear
Although I know that we have a different world and are set apart
but somehow the feeling never stops, though I wish not to hope anything out of it.
Words cannot describe my thoughts and feeling towards it..
Frankly speaking, it is one thing that kept me alive and moving on.. hm...moving on?
Well, according to your story, I might not be the only one who feel this way
but this is me... my life.. before, now and probably then...
no denial anymore, no refusal anymore..
But shall I pursue it or just live with it?
I don't know.. I wish I know.. really


my world is divided between logic and desire..
logically I do not wish for it but my heart is longing for it...
funny how it contradict itself
how can I live with such contradiction?
I do not know.
I do not deny it, I do not refuse it
am I okay? well I am
am I happy? most of the time, yes..
I'm not living in pain for sure...


Yes, this is about my life.. but it is all about you too
It's always been about you.
Do I ask anything from you?
I don't even know the answer to that
I'm just too busy thinkin' of my self...
and dreamin' about you...

CNY eve

today I enjoyed preaching the word..
we did a bible study from the story of the wedding in Cana
only 24 of us.. quite good though
afterward I had lunch with Yosua
bought some T-shirt and give them to uncle Jeff and the security guy at campus..
I feel so good about it..
it's always the spirit of sharing God's blessing...
although I'm not celebrating Chinese New Year...
after all.. I'm just a fake one
hehehehe...

turtle.inc

a new future in the new year

definitely, maybe

ah.. old story...
maybe, definitely... definitely, maybe...

Infinite Frameworks

today I visited Infinite Frameworks..
met with lots of animators there..
gossh... reminded me of my ol' days at college
living up a dream to be an animator
well.. the visit sparks my imagination..
of the world I left behind....

the manager even offered me to join in,
off course it needs a portofolio which I can only laugh upon
but still...
my youth blood was boiling up again..

darker than the nite

the title says it all!
this movie has come to the audience bearing the cape crusader's ego as a hero and turn it into a contemporary dark movies, unlike any super hero movies before. Nolan has turn the image of the Bat and reveal the true face of Batman to the audience. Anger and frustration yet bound by the morality of his cape brings the movie into life.. I needed time to digest everything into my mind becoz when I enter the theater i was hoping for a more 'superhero' movie.. but instead I was given a cruel unforgiving incredibly astounding drama of a battle between hope and desperation. this is a real super hero movie.. this is truly the one that reveals batman when he said " I'm not a super hero".

Although the story amazed me, I didn't see Gotham in the movie. Where is this famous city filled with fear and crime?? it suddenly disappeared!! It was just like another American big city. And just to add, most of the gadgets are a bit disappointing,-even the costume and the pod bike- but I must say that the acting was first class, especially the joker. Ledger gave his best in his last performance. The Joker was not a joke anymore..I even thought that this is more like a Joker movie rather than the bat itself. too bad the ending was not what I hoped for.. I believe Nolan can make a better and more thrilling third installment of the movie if he just let Harvey continue what he had become and build a totally brand new image of him in the third movie. although the thrill was superb, in my opinion the climax was never there. much action or fight needed to close such a wonderful drama. And as for Ledger, an Oscar is for you to bring home! thanks for your performance. it really live-up the tension. Needles to say, i hope the third installment will accommodate both the action saga and drama as we move to a darker world of the dark knight! Geniuss !!

the good inside people

the goodness inside people are like diamonds...

it can be very beautiful..

but when it is still like a rock..

we might only see it as ugly and worthless...

see the inside of people, not what is outside

yea, we need time and effort to do so..

but in the end you'll find a beautiful diamond inside it...

after all

after all this time...
a time when i left to start a new journey to seek God and with God...
after 5 months of new life...

i think i found another new life...

after all..

thursday morning ...
the rain pour down heavily..
black clouds are hangin in the air
preventing the sun to shine...

the feeling i have this morning was the same as the weather...
tommorow i'll be gone...
i'm scared...
i'm so sad....

Jakarta Culinary Walk

The jakarta culinary walk....
The loong anticipated venue was delayed.. and for us, cancelled..
quite dissapointed, but nothing to be bothered laah..
another wonder..another unexpected thing...
but i realize it didn't stop me from ejoying life..
coz in front of me lies more options, waiting for me to grab
bandung culinary walk, or bible study with the LGers, or a family reunion at pulaw putri...
we'll see what will come up next...

Life Group = Living Group??

it is this week our Life Group turned into a Living Group
sunday we met @ Surya Utama
yesterday we met again to watch spiderman 3 @ TA
today we're gonna have a life group meeting @ robert's..
tomorrow we're gonna split up.. yola will have a meeting, i will lead a youth fellowhsip @ kedoya, and the rest of the gang will be having a bible study @ GKY Mangga besar.
afterwards we'll gonna round up for dinner somewhere (why is it always about food?) & probably spend the nite @ robert's..
saturday we'll also meet for the second day of bible study..
and the fact is.. i enjoyed it..

life group macam apa ini??
wekekekek....

monday nite Booo...link

played bowlink with sam n the uph'ers..
cathie, kalenk, nia, ariel, ucoks, san san, teteh, n jessica
we splitted into 2 lines, each lines with 5 bowlers..
ariel, kalenk and nia are good...
it'll make a great competitions.. next time that is hehe

its fun.. great nite, though i didn't win the game =)
hahaha.. its a wonderful experience...
ow yea.. forget to mention.. i slipped a few times hehe
slippery when not wet =D

before, the plan was to eat at konro karebosi..
sam n i missed the dinner coz the traffic was so high....
i didn't want to have dinner actually, so at first i think i didn't miss a thing
but as i said to a friend, i realize that i missed the atmosphere, the 'fourplay'


afterwards,..
we went to WGP to eat ropita
i was amazed with jessica's 'power' to eat. she didn't stop at all!!
huwaaa... she should join an eating contest..hehehe..
wel, the nite rise up and the moon was high..
a nite for yet another unexpected things...
another nite to wonder


i'm sniffing sumthin different..
what was on your mind cath?? haeaheahaha....
its like you're not concentrating on the bowling alley
and dont tell me its becoz you're hungry
i guess i sniff dat u sniff =D
thanks for askin us to join eniwei...

a week full of wonder

week 18

Monday
the feeling left from PYPL Kajadu still existed. the enthusiasm, the joy, and all tiredness comes together ... but most of all, i'm damn tired!
I didn't do anything in particular, just tryin' to rest my mind.. (and body as well)..
but the day was filled with happiness.
one of my friend was inaugurated as a pastor.
she is one of my partner in Life Group team, and she is a very damn good pastor...(one of my favorite pastors) hehehe.. wel I hope she will always be herself, not developed to be what her congregations wants.. to keep believing in her idealism and be blessings for people around her..
my best wishes for her in pursuing the will of God.. go for it Girl!

Tuesday
Life Group Meeting day.
Jeje was leading the meeting, and it went well.. we progress quite a bit and show improvement which we really needed.. as usual the meeting went till midnite ... benita joined in the team.. a good atmosphere we had. I hope the team and the materials will continue to develop from day to day, week to week, month to month and year to year. This is something really big what we're doin. I hope everybody realize it as well... all glory to you Lord

late at nite there was not many words..
just VIVA LIVERPOOL!!
a fantastic moment it was in a marvelous breath taking game, a high tension game which made me even hard to breathe and watch the game. but again, the lads perfectly beaten chelsea in a penalty kick drama which made them thru to the finals!! Awesomee dudee!!
Athens!! he're we come, we'll win it 6 times!!
YOU"LL NEVER WALK ALONE....

Wednesday
wel, not much.. just a milan game which they won superbly against manchester united
but it did make me smile that day... hehehehe.. no offense MU guys =D

Thursday
Alice's concert. the nite's theme was Simply Vivaldi.
This time she leads in a solo performance.. and its good (wel, i never know when there's a mistake or two.. so for me it was great hehe) great performance lizzie!
listening to this kind of concert just brings you to enjoy yourself..
especially when you hear and see a live performance harp.. wel, it bring old memory when i was still in bangkok and Ms. Jansen played the harp beautifully, though i didn't remember anything about the vibe..
it was an interesting nite.. i went with obet and we both enjoyed it. had a long chat at his apartment till midnite where i spend the nite.

Friday
i surveyed around Surya Utama for the 'amazing race' life group. I had everything i need and we'll be ready for the day. packed up and ready to go!

Saturday
the Jesus Dynasty seminar revealed the explanation needed...period.
met Yola with her new haircut... and some new gossips arise .. wel, its life man....just enjoy it eh.. =D
in the evening i lead gunsa teens fellowship. it took 3 hours but it was great, i believe the kids get something from the lord.. you're just great lord.. awesome dudee!!...
afterwards cathie, sam n i circle around and bumped ourselves to tamani cafe.. been a loooong time since the last time i ate there.. after dinner and some theory chat..hehe we went to ragusa.. the old fashined ice cream.. to bad it was about to close.. but we had the nite already, and its time to sleep.. zzz....

Sunday
Life Group Time!! and its amazing race episode!
can't say much.. but it was awesomee!! it went well and everybody was happy.. including the four of us.. obet, jeje, sam n me.. we learned a lot from it as well and i see sam was getting along very nicely here, and he enjoyed it very much.. good for you bro! and again.. glory to the man most high! after life group we went for sushi with yola.. the 5 of us...
had a good time and the next route was to yola's house.. we talked about 2 hours there
and we end the day with whatever we may think and feel..
but for me.. i'm definitely getting FATTER this week!
and you call that diet?? hauhauhaa....

but everything was a wonder.. its great and fulfilling..
just a simple thanks to you...

failure

turning point

for everything there had to be a turning point...
a time when you can resolve things...
a decision to turn your life into a brighter day or a darker night
well maybe you don't understand any of it for a while
but when you make that decision, you realize...
it was somethin had to be done...
sometimes it can sound foolish, or maybe even crazy
sometimes it can also sound wise and mature
how ever it sounds.. you make the decision

and sometimes it need to take you to a place you'd never expect
make you stumble, dizzle, confused, burdened, and distracted
just to take you back to realize
it was the turning point
to resolve..
to make peace again with nature and life
another chapter had been closed, another chapter awaits..

when ...

when there's a sudden change...
one must question what had happen? there might be 3 reasons..
a) a sudden busy life, b) a wind of change, or c) a mistake by ones man.
and in order to restore this madness, should this man bow down to his knees for forgivemess that he might not know? or just wait till things eventually came back to where it belong,..
what should a man do?
one may wonder....